This week Facebook Memories brought to mind an unpleasant but crucial memory. The death of my mom. It has been five years since she lost her short battle with liver cancer. At 57 she had so much more life to live, grandkids to spoil, and wisdom to impart. But it was not to be.
I mention this because that event started a chain reaction in myself that ultimately resulted in the creation of AVNation. The death of a parent may seem an odd reason to start a podcast but I guess you just had to know me five years ago.
Five years ago I was afraid of my own shadow. My time spent in radio and television was done as part of an ensemble, not as the front. The career decisions I had made up until that time had been cautious and planned. Yes, there was an entrepreneur spirit, a creative streak, and a writing talent but no one had ever really seen it. I was afraid.
Afraid of rejection. Afraid of success. Afraid of what others would think of me. I had spent my life being afraid and being cautious because of that fear. When my mother died something in me shifted. My mom was only 20 years older than me. It was almost as if something in me woke up and said, “Why not?”
What’s the worst thing that can happen? No one listens. No one reads. No one likes what you have to say. Ok, so what?
To me, watching my mother pass away was the worst thing. In comparison, someone not liking something I wrote, or a piece I produced, paled in comparison.
Now, I have moved past that initial thought and push. Yes, I miss my mother dearly. Especially on special occasions, milestones, and anniversaries. Mother’s Day has never really been the same. But it is not the driving force today. Today it is the reaction and feedback I get from creating. Would I ever had ventured out? I will never know the answer to that.
This is just my experience, but I want to encourage you to try something you are afraid of attempting. A number of friends have taken to writing books. Business books, children’s stories, and others. They encourage and inspire me. You should take a chance, do something that scares you, take a risk. What is the worst thing that can happen?
Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Have a great week.